therealkaichan | Chapter Eleven, because xD

Chapter Eleven
Peace

Celine sighed.

She had gone home, took the less fulfilling nap in her life, and then she had taken her day off as Elimiel said. Celine had been as responsible as she could to finish as many things as she could before possibly getting her butt kicked by the Mother. She chatted with her parents, called her friends on the phone, did as much homework as she could, and in the afternoon, made her way to the meeting place.

And she had been there for a while, waiting for someone to pop up. At least Haziel had helped keep her entertained with small chatter and a few drinks ‘on the house’ as she always said, did she ever actually charge anyone for drinks anyway? Celine wasn’t sure, she had never seen it at least.

The first one to arrive was Josiah. Celine was a little happy that he wasn’t really involved in the story, at least not directly, and she waved at him as soon as he was on sight. He was a jerk, but he was a sincere jerk and that was nice to now.
“Are you feeling all right, Celine?” Josiah smiled, and she half regretted ever waving at him.
“Don't be a jerk, jerk.”
“All right, all right.” He chuckled. “I heard about the Nanael thing. Never expected her to be so deep into this betrayal stuff.”
“I... I’m sincerely not sure of how to feel about this.”
“Tell me about it?”
“So, she did betray her side, and apparently she was okay with.... Wait, can you promise to keep it between us?”
“So I can't go prattling about it to everyone?”
“Definitely no.”
“Hm... Fine. I promise.” Josiah grinned, moving to take a seat in the stool to Celine’s right.
“All right.”
“Wow that was easy.”
“You've given me no reason to mistrust you... Actually so far you are probably the most trustworthy guy here and that’s horrifying.”
“It sure is. Now, about the Nanael thing...”
“That, yeah... When things blew up, Nanael ended up going a bit creepier than I though she’d be... She seemed to be pretty angry.”
“It figures, her plan had just failed, right?”
“Yes... She seemed to be angry at the Mother... And at us humans as well.”
“And why was that?”
“She said that we should just destroy each other. I can barely imagine how a thing like that would be...”
“I can understand that. If she’s angry at us...”
“It’s still a horrible thought.”
“And?”
“I still feel bad about her getting punished.”
“Why would you? She tried to kill everyone, to get you in trouble, and she lied to everyone.”
“But... I can see why she did it. She was blind, by some feelings that are really hard to stop or control. I wonder if I would have done the same if I were in her situation.”
“Probably not. You are an actually kind person, while she acted out of anger and selfishness.”
“I suppose...”
“But there is something else bothering you, is it not?” Celine frowned and then sighed. Was she that obvious, or was it that Josiah was too perceptive? She wasn’t really sure.
“Yes. There is another thing.”
“And what is it?”
“The Mother.”
“Oh. Ooooh! Tell me about that one!”
“She... She is strange. I think there are many more things in her mind than we think. And we usually just assume that she’s there and that she will always be there... But before this I had never wondered why exactly she does this.”
“Can't she be doing it out of the kindness of her heart?”
“Maybe she is. Maybe she isn't... That’s the thing. We don’t know anything about her.”
“Most people don’t really care about those things. They are fine as long as their lives are nice and easy.”
“I... I had never realized that before. That even when we are always told to be kind and selfless, we are really selfish without even knowing it.”
“That is the worst type of selfishness, Celine.”
“I know... That’s why I don’t want to be selfish anymore. I want to understand why people do things, and help them feel better.”
“And that is why you feel bad for Nanael, right?”
“Yes... I think she was a little angry before, but that seeing everyone be so ungrateful made her angrier, until she couldn’t take it anymore.”
“And she snapped. It sounds pretty reasonable. So, suppose you manage to get her pardoned. What comes next?”
“I’m not sure. The world is really big and there are so many of us... And I don’t think everyone is ready to change and get better.”
“Then maybe you should start small.”
“Small... It makes sense. I’m only one girl, but maybe... Maybe people can also learn and eventually help.”
“Correct.”
“Then... I’ll do my best. I’ll take the time to learn to understand people, and maybe even help them.”
“Hmm...”
“But not only humans. Humans have a lot to learn... But I think angels do too. They have lived for so long, and seen so many things, that sometimes they must also lose focus of what they really want and feel.”
“Then maybe, you should start with the top.”
“The top... You mean the Mother?”
“She does have many things in her mind, right? And you are one of the few humans who has had the luck to see her so many times... Maybe you should take that chance.”
“Yes... That sounds like a great idea. I’ll talk to her next time. I’ll see if I can help in anything.”
“Some people just need a little kindness. Even super angels with superpowers.”
“And you? Do you have someone to be nice at you, Josiah?”
“It’s a fun story... But I do. Let’s just leave it for another day.”
“All right. But don’t think you’ll get out of telling me.”
“Oh I won't. I wouldn't miss a chance to break your brain a little more for the world.”

For a moment they both smiled. Celine her nice, amused smile, and Josiah that slightly creepy amused smile of his. That face that said ‘I know something you don’t’ still got on her nerves, but she said nothing. He had been pretty decent with her today, so in return she wouldn’t tell him he was a jerk more than needed.

“Say, are you waiting for anyone today?” He interrupted her thoughts, and she nodded.
“Yes. The other day Elena agreed to meet me here today. It’s a little strange to not see her around yet, but maybe it is beause we didn’t agree a particular time.”
“Or maybe she’s upstairs. Want me to go get her for you?”
“Are you feeling okay? You’re being much too nice.”
“Remember what I told you just a minute ago?” Josiah got up from his stool, grinning. “Everyone needs a little kindness. Even silly, far too kind girls.”

Celine only managed to roll her eyes before he left. He had to be a jerk even when being nice, didn’t he? She only had to wait for a few minutes, before seeing Elena coming from upstairs. Celine didn't remember ever seeing her like this before, so quiet.
“Hello...” She greeted.
“Elena... Are you okay?”
“A bit. I’m very tired...”
“Come and take a seat. I’ll ask for something to drink for you.”
“Thanks...”
“Are you worried about what happened yesterday...?”
“A little... I heard about Nanael.”
“Oh... Then you know about your Angel?”
“Yes. It’s... Strange.”
“What is?”
“Nanael was my Counselor.”
“She was?” Celine couldn’t quite imagine that. Nanael had said that she had been a counselor, but Elena’s? Was that also part of her plan?
“I told her about my Angel. I told her that I trusted my angel with my life. And she always told me that a dream was a dream... And I wonder if she was playing me along, or if...”
“When did you... When did you find out?”
“A few days before giving you my knife that hurts.”
“So you... You knew?”
“Yes. I still went with it because I though that if you were also in this, you had to know what you were doing better than me.”
“I didn’t know much either.”
“But it still ended up okay... We stopped the machines for a bit, right?”
“I suppose that’s right...”
“I’m... A little angry at her. She lied to me for a long time...”
“I would be angry in your place too, I suppose... But you know... She was a really sad person.”
“Nanael...? I never saw her as that.”
“I think she was lonely. And angry... And it got out of hand.”
“But what she did is still wrong, right?”
“Yes. But maybe... Would you give her a second chance, Elena?”
“A year ago I wouldn’t.” Elena frowned. “She lied to all of us, and she didn’t want to help at all...”
“And now?”
“I think I would. You gave me a second chance too. And I became a better person because of it... Maybe she need that, just like me.”
“So you agree... I’m happy.” Celine smiled. “I though nobody would agree.”
“Will you try to help her?”
“Yes. I’ll try... I want to talk to the Mother and see if I can get her to reconsider, at least a little.”
“The Mother...”
“Did something happen with her?”
“She was the one who told me. Maybe if anyone else had said Nanael was my Angel I wouldn’t have believed them... But the Mother? She has been working so hard for us, and both Nanael and my Angel always told me to trust her. She even stopped my investigation.”
“I never expected that.” Celine frowned. Once again the Mother seemed to be another step ahead. It was all so strange. If she knew all of this, why didn't she act? Why didn’t she actually stop Nanael?
“Neither did I. But in the end she was right. So I decided to wait for you, and see what you would do. I was pretty sure our ideas were aligned.”
“You sound so different, Elena.”
“I do?” Elena smiled. “Sometimes it’s nicer to be like a child, is it not? Children don't have to worry or think. They don’t make difficult choices, everything comes naturally and they follow their heart. I sound different, but I haven’t changed a bit.”
“That’s good.”
“So please, try to get Nanael out of this. And let’s hope that she also starts following a kinder idea of the world, okay?”
“I will. I promise.”

Their conversation died out after that, and both sat in comfortable silence. Things were changing very fast, but right now Celine was seeing a small light of hope. Maybe there was a chance, maybe she could actually make a change with kindness in this world. And the idea was a beautiful one.

She needed to talk to the Mother next. Things were getting more and more tangled up, and clearly some answers were needed soon. And she knew that the Mother would have the answers she needed and even more.

The next day, Celine got up from bed early and headed to the Office to talk to the Mother. It had to be now, before she lost her confidence. She frowned, remembering what Josiah had told her. It was all about conviction, right? She had to be sure of what she was doing. She had to trust in herself, in her power to change things.

It was the beginning of change.

Celine made her way to the Mother’s office, and smiled at Imriel.
“Good morning, Imriel.”
“Good morning to you as well, miss Celine. We weren’t expecting you.” He smiled and her, and Celine couldn’t help but remember the things Elimiel had said about him. She couldn't even imagine this kind man hurting anyone, much less being a vicious killer, but people clearly weren’t that easy to read.
“I don’t have an appointment or anything but I wanted to talk to the Mother about the Investigation regarding Nanael. Is she available...?”
“I’ll check with her. Do you need to take a seat?”
“Thank you.” Celine smiled politely. “But I can wait here.”
“As you wish.” Imriel stood from his chair, walking to the Mother’s office. He knocked, and after a little went in. For a moment only a very faint whisper could be heard, and then Imriel came out. “You may go in, miss Celine.”
“Thanks a lot.” She grinned, and Imriel moved aside to let her pass.

The Mother looked a little different today. To begin with, she wasn’t reading anything when Celine came in, and her coffee cup seemed to be much too cold, since there was no steam coming from it. Nevertheless, the angel smiled at Celine as soon as she went in.
“Please, take a seat. Is there anything you need to tell me?”
“Yes.” Celine sat, crossing her hands over her lap. “I need to talk to you.”
“I’m listening, child.”
“I’ve been thinking... And I want to make a request. I know it will sound crazy, and I know it is probably not a good idea, but the last time you considered my idea, and found a solution, so maybe you could do the same this time.”
“I see. And what is it?”
“Can I ask you a question first?”
“Go ahead.”
“Do you ever feel alone?”
“Alone...?”
“Yes. I know you have a lot of angels around and all, but do you feel lonely?”
“Why would you ask such a question?”
“I was thinking about the things Nanael said. About you having changed, and about the other angels... And about what you said, about not caring about them.”
“I see...”
“And I wondered if maybe you felt alone as well. I realized that we humans take you and the other angels for granted. We never sat to think why you were helping us, or why you were willing to do so much to help a group of people who never really thank you.”
“And what did you think?”
“Elimiel told me a story... About you and your brother. And a war... It was a sad story, I never knew you had gone trough so much before this... Nobody does. You fought your own brother... I can’t imagine how would that be. I can’t imagine how so many centuries of wars could make me feel, but even then... You still found it in yourself to care for us.”
“And your point is?” The Mother’s voice was neutral.
“That we all live knowing we can lean on you... But you never feel like you can lean on someone else.”
“Leaning on someone else, you say.”
“Yes. You always care for us, but who cares for you?”
“That is pointless to wonder.”
“You... You told Nanael you didn’t care. And yet she remembers how you fought alongside them, how you cried their deaths and helped bury them... You weren’t always like now, were you?”
“People change, child.”
“But why? What did you learn that changed you so much? When did you start thinking that kindness could only hurt you?”
“You won’t stop until I tell you, will you?”
“I won’t. I want to know, I want to change things.”
“Fine.”
“Fine...?”
“Elimiel told you about my creation, I take it?”
“He said you were created with another one, your brother.”
“My name was Michael, and my purpose was Order. I was created to uphold order and law, to fight God’s holy wars, and to lead his army... When my brother refused him, I tried to convince him to stop that madness... I was like you all, children. Blinded by what I thought was his love.”
“And what happened?”
“We fought. We fought for so long, that we started forgetting there was even a true reason for fighting. It wasn’t about God’s so called judgement. I remember feeling so angry at my brother.” The Mother chuckled quietly. “You do know well how hard it can be to reason and understand stubborn people, right?”
“I do.” Celine smiled just a little and nodded.
“But I still fought God’s wars, because I wanted to believe that He would look upon us kindly. That as long as I played by His rules, He would someday forgive my foolish brother for his ignorance. That He would listen to me... He was my creator. He was my father, and I was certain that He was wise and kind.”
“And was he?”
“In a way. It took me millenia to understand that He had no kindness or love for what he saw as tools. He had kindness for the humans, but not for us. I wondered if He regretted creating us, if He wanted to get rid of us... So I asked Him. When I look back I realize how foolish I was as well, how my wishful thinking blinded me of the things He had done so far.”
“And... What did he tell you?”
“He said that we were tools. That our purposes bound us to a single fate and utility. And that as a tool, I should simply complete my duty and not formulate opinions. A tool that didn't do its work was simply useless and should be discarded.”
“That’s so cruel...”
“I can understand why He did it. For Him we weren't really something that could feel. He didn’t give us free will, so we weren’t supposed to develop like this. And I see that he is right. We aren't like you humans, the studies Elimiel’s unit made show clearly that there are many differences in how humans and angels work.”
“It was then that you stopped fighting?”
“No. That happened later. I kept on fighting, even knowing that He would never smile upon us. I couldn’t bring myself to stop, every part of my body asked for me to work harder, to fight until the Order was restored to the world...” The Mother took her cup, and Celine noticed that now steam was coming out of it.
“And...?”
“And one day I simply stopped caring. And even when my whole being begged me to fight, I realized that there was no point. The humans we were supposed to save, wouldn’t be saved by fighting. But by then it was too late. Of course my army didn’t take that easily. I had trained them too well, I suppose. They needed to fight like you humans need to breathe. Sadly I couldn’t bring myelf to care.”
“Elimiel said there were many conflicts...”
“There were, yes. But in the end it was all pointless.”
“Then why did you take your sword that last time?”
“The humans were destroying themselves. And God did no longer speak to us. His Presence was gone from our lives, and we couldn’t understand what had gone wrong... And it’s funny to put it like that, but we panicked. I had failed in upholding Order, but maybe, just maybe, defeating the demons would tip the scales.” She took a sip of her cup, chuckling quietly. “We were delusional.”
“It was then that the worlds were divided, rigtht?”
“Yes.”
“So you are no longer at war...?”
“No. Though sadly there is very little left of the two brothers that were created that day.”
“You have changed, right...?”
“Yes. And so has my brother. Any chance of us ever managing to mend things up is long gone.”
“And... How did you end up doing this? How did you decide that this world had to be like this?”
“I tried something different at first. I tried to give humans freedom and learning. We worked to teach them love and kindness. But many still did not learn. They were aggressive and wanted to harm their equals... This was very dangerous, especially since the last time they had been the ones to bring in their own destruction, so one of our scientists suggested creating a formula that would dampen the aggressivity, since it was the only problem.”
“Was that...?”
“Yes. Elimiel worked on the bliss formula for centuries, perfecting it... And before we realized it, all humans were getting their treatments. We assigned Counselors to help them feel comfortable with the world and to supervise that Bliss wasn’t harming them, and that eventually took us here.”
“I understand.”
“So, are you satisfied, Celine?”
“I have another question. Elimiel. He said he had a ‘pass’... And there is also the meeting place and the rebels... Why do you let them do those things?”
“Fighting my brother made me stronger. I grew and perfected myself to fulfill my Purpose. And even though eventually it was pointless, I understand that adversity makes something either break or grow stronger. So when he said that he was unsatisfied with this world, we reached an agreement. He would spur conflict, but never cause it. He would participate a bit, but never too much. And if he found a way to break the system within our rules, then I would take no further actions in restoring it.”
“So it isn’t a lie... When you said that if the humans were the ones to start a new world, you wouldn’t stop them, right?”
“Exactly. If you humans can make your own peaceful world, I’d be glad to let you be free. That is why I didn’t stop you from causing all this trouble. It may be the beginning of your growth.”
“I understand...”
“But even with all of this, you haven’t made your request.”
“That’s true... Well, I’m ready to ask now.”
“I’m listening.”
“I want Nanael to get a second chance.”
“Now, that’s surprising.” The Mother leaned back on her chair, and took a sip of her coffee. “What are your reasons?”
“I... I disagree with the things you said... About Angels not changing. Your story only confirmed it, you can change as well, you just change in different ways... But you still have feelings. She was hurt and her beliefs abandoned her. She wanted your attention, but you were no longer looking at her... If anything more than mean spirited she is a really sad being.”
“But she still acted wrongly.”
“I know. And I’m not saying that she should go unpunished... But Elimiel mentioned a ‘full treatment’... And I don’t think that’s fine.”
“It would set a terrible example for the other angels. They have to know that rules are to be respected.”
“Then let me help.” Celine smiled, standing. “I’ll make it so you’ll have the best reason to let her go. And if it is a good one... Then you will consider it. And maybe even consider opening your heart up.”
“I don’t need a reason, Celine. What I need is a guarantee that this won’t spur any further rebellion.”
“I will make it so. I’ll make sure none of Nanael’s colleagues consider another rebellion.”
“And how will you do that?”
“The only way in which I can do things. With kindness.”

As soon as Celine put a foot outside of the office, she let go of a breath she didn’t even know she was holding. Her hands were trembling a little, but during her time in there, when listening to the Mother’s words, she had understood that the world had been hurt enough, and that maybe it was time to give it a small twist.

It was at least worth a shot, right?

“Miss Celine, are you well?”
“I am. Better than ever, Imriel.” She smiled widely. “I need to ask you a question... It’s a bit crazy, but maybe you can point me in the right direction?”
“Please, go ahead.”
“I need to make a transmission. A big one, like the ones the Mother does when she has something important to say...”
“That would require a permit from the Mother. Transmissions in all the chains work like that.”
“I get it. How can I ask for that permit?”
“I can get the paperwork done, if you wish.”
“Really? That’s very nice of you.”
“I don’t mind it. It’s just a small form. I will fill it and request a space.”
“Thanks a lot...! I’ll make sure to make it worth it, I promise.”
“I’m certain you will, miss Celine. Can I help you with anything else?”
“No, this is more than fine.”
“Then have a good day, miss Celine. Please take good care of yourself.”
“I will.”

Celine dropped in her bed, sighing.

She wasn't quite ready for this. She wasn't even really sure what her plan was. She did know that there was a way to solve this, because there was a solution for everything, but she didn't quite know what she would say in that broadcast she had asked for.

And yet, she knew there was a way.

And well, if she had to find it on the run, then she would.

---

Notas: Got here kinda lateish.

Oh well.

Chapter Eleven, because xD

no subject

no subject